right to do wrong. i have the right to abuse you because you remind me of other abusers —unhealed wounds I know that for some people, my sharing the story of how I almost left Islam and of how I reached such a dark place that I nearly took my own life is a cause for mockery and condescension toward …
This must be what it feels like to give up on your soul, I remember thinking years ago when I nearly left Islam. During that difficult time, I began to understand emotional pain like I never did before. I began to understand spiritual darkness like I never did before. And I began to understand sin like I never did before. …
The following is an excerpt from the book Prejudice Bones in My Body: Essays on Muslim Racism, Bigotry and Spiritual Abuse by Umm Zakiyyah: “Good,” she said so matter-of-factly that I was momentarily confused. Blinking, I held the phone’s receiver as I processed this simple response that held little connection to what I had just said. It was months after …
Some time ago, a friend of mine shared with me a humorous post that was posted on the social media account of the famous artist, Cardi B. I don’t remember the exact words, but it said something to this effect: I asked God to remove all the toxic people from my life—and I almost died. Though this post gave me …
Shukr. Looking within. Trusting the pain and loss. As I step into a new year and we approach the blessed month of Ramadan, bi’idhnillah, these are the things that I’m striving to focus on and implement in my heart and life. In these past few years, I’ve worked through so much emotional wounding and spiritual turmoil that it’s difficult to …
The following is an excerpt from the book No One Taught Me the Human Side of Islam, the story of “The Muslim Hippie” living with bipolar disorder, who shared her story with Umm Zakiyyah: The day I sat on that panel in 1996 and shared how I converted to Islam was the beginning of the end for me. But I …
“I guarantee a house on the outskirts of Paradise for one who abandons arguments even if he is right, and a house in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lies even when joking, and a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who makes his character excellent.” —Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him (Sunan Abu Dawud …
“Too much control thrives when family members cling to a myth that everything is perfect when it’s not.” —Dan Neuharth, If You Had Controlling Parents The following is an excerpt from Reverencing the Wombs That BROKE You by Umm Zakiyyah: Perhaps it is through observing the enduring affection between mother and child that has most significantly inspired our concepts of unconditional love, …
The following is an excerpt from the book And Then I Gave Up: Essays About Faith and Spiritual Crisis in Islam by Umm Zakiyyah: Some years ago, I was sitting with a friend of mine and she started telling me about her struggles with hijab after becoming Muslim. She had grown up Christian and accepted Islam while she was in college. “For me, hijab was …
“Ramadan is the month of mercy, not the month of perfection. You’ll still make mistakes, and you’ll still fall short at times. But Allah’s mercy remains. Seek it, and don’t give up.” —from the journal of Umm Zakiyyah The following is an excerpt from the book And Then I Gave Up: Essays About Faith and Spiritual Crisis in Islam by Umm Zakiyyah: I returned …
